Thanks for taking the time to read my post and responding!

“i get really frustrated by labels, i have been renouncing all of them, taking some back, renouncing again …”

I understand this. None of the racial/ethnic labels made any sense to me either, so I opted using descriptions instead. There’s never a simple, clear-cut word or term to sum it up nicely.

“biological theory of race (caucasoid, negroid, mongoloid) is what made me the MOST confused about whether or not arabs where white, and then in college i learned that that theory was debunked in the 70s and is totally racist… but my world studies teacher had taught it as fact to my class in high school.”

The biological classifications helped me make sense of things by offering an explanation of biological variants that determine what we know as “races.” I have heard the theory was debunked, likely for its racist implications (or more accurately, how it was improperly used to justify the racist agenda of those in power). As for the theory itself, I am not well-versed, but as I understand it it’s based on rather basic documented physical distinctions (forehead spacing, nose shapes, cheek bone prominence). Now, granted, plenty of the claimed distinctions likely are unfounded as it seems everyone throughout history has had an agenda to serve. But for me, this theory serves no real use in justifying differential treatment of humans based on the biological category (or categories) they belong to. It broke human groups down to varying external bodily characteristics, of which social and intellectual distinctions have been inferred, serving as the arbitrary basis on which to mount the concept of superiority/inferiority. This helps me to comprehend just how asinine and arbitrary our grand social hierarchy truly is.

“is it possible to just be, and feel like you’re something different, without it being self-hate?”

I don’t see why not. But I can also see where some individuals would experience a tremendous amount of conflict, especially if they form a prejudice against members of a race or ethnic group that they are part of. Just as prejudice of any kind typically requires a person to disassociate with the group they’re prejudiced against and stereotype the members using arbitrary criteria, the most effective way to combat this is to see and judge people as individuals first and foremost. If you’re not looking at people as simply members of various groups, there’s little reason to feel hate toward a group and all of its members, including yourself in the case of self-hating.

The term “hate” isn’t one I care to use often as, in my thinking, it can only be applied to specific individuals and entities and defies any useful logic when applied to entire groups. You may hate something some members or a group are doing, but how can you hate them all, collectively, without knowing them? Oh, granted, it’s claimed to happen all the time, but that’s still a tough concept for me to fully grasp as it doesn’t make sense or serve any useful humanitarian purpose. I find the popular usage of the word “hate” (no less “self-hate” ) troubling though it’s difficult to pin-point exactly why. Perhaps because that word doesn’t seem fitting. It’s something else. Hate is experienced between individuals and toward entities, but in reference to contemptuous behavior and feelings between and toward groups of people, I think it’s more complex than that. (Not that that matters really in this conversation.)

Thanks for leaving a comment! I’ve appreciated your input on the subject, as it isn’t everyday that I get to speak with someone with a similar …um…(I don’t even know what to call it lol)… Makeup! That’s a good way to phrase it I suppose.

AM

“the lack of social constraints is also liberating as I my loyalties aren’t based on my racial or ethnic identity. Who would I be loyal to? White people? Arab-Americans? Native Americans? Other Southern white/Arab/Native American-blended folks (I’ve never met another one)?”

i have had conversations with other mixed friends about this; being mixed, we don’t have a home in any one ethnic group, which can be both alienating and liberating. also wondering whether there is something liberating about self-representation through blogs and other independent media when you’re mixed; like i always feel like i’m under so much scrutiny in person because ppl are trying to figure out what i am, etc– this doesn’t happen online – if i call myself an arab american online, what image does that bring up for people? if i have to add qualifiers to that like “i’m arab but have a white mom,” what is the point of it?

i get really frustrated by labels, i have been renouncing all of them, taking some back, renouncing again … actually i didn’t start identifying as a person of color until about three years ago, before that i was just confused. actually the thing that you say here about arabs being caucasoid is interesting because that biological theory of race (caucasoid, negroid, mongoloid) is what made me the MOST confused about whether or not arabs where white, and then in college i learned that that theory was debunked in the 70s and is totally racist… but my world studies teacher had taught it as fact to my class in high school.

“If you have any color at all, you’re handed the “woman of color” label, and yet, you’re not accepted by most other self-identified “women of color” because you lack the ethnic cultural component and are thereby handed the new label of “passes for white.””

i think this is SO true, except that in recent years i have luckily been able to become part of a women of color community that includes lots of mixed “passes for white” women so i don’t feel inauthentic. but that is definately what kept me from being comfortable within the arab community for a long time – even still most arabs within my community are other rejects, lol. i think a lot of mixed-white women of color have experienced self-hate, wanting to be fully white, etc, and so when they see another mixed women not identifying as woc it can become personal: is it possible to just be, and feel like you’re something different, without it being self-hate?

there is definately a grey area. i have been feeling more attached to labels like mixed and queer, more than Arab American and feminist, lately. but still they’re so arbitrary! thanks for letting me leave such a long comment and thanks for writing this!