This is one of those nights where I can’t help but reflect back on memories over the past five years. These are the nights where I remember the good parts. There was plenty amusing conversation and nights out on the town, but there were also nights spent in, occasionally grilling on the back deck, almost always enjoying a bottle (or two) of wine. Sometimes the conversations were about their jobs and fields, which were genuinely interesting; at other times, the conversations were more solemn as they struggled with their choices and feelings over family-related issues. There are people out there who truly need someone to talk to, and I was glad to be there to help. As strange as that might sound to some.
Taking care of men was never my gripe. I enjoy caring for men (or hell, people); it’s the societal (and typical individual) attitudes about prostitution that make it so difficult to endure. At least for someone who can’t keep her damn mouth shut. It was too much to accept that I shouldn’t be proud of the work I do, because whether we as a society get it or not, prostitution appears to be here to stay after having remained popular up through the ages. No, prostitutes should not be forced, mistreated, trafficked, or relegated to the bottom rung in the overall social sphere. In a perfect world it would be a viable option for women who so choose to go that route on their own volition. *sigh* In a perfect world the men would respect women and thereby see no reason to treat prostitution in a dirty, clandestine fashion.
In reality, it’s a tough option to support publicly, considering how it’s all too often carried out. But it remains a part of my life I’ll never regret or forget. For me, it was worth it. In fact, it comes so natural to work as a companion to men that I’m tempted to say it’s a part of who I am. Not just the job, but the caregiver role of tending to the needs of another. I could have worked with animals or women, but the opportunity that presented itself back then was to work with men and that seemed the most natural fit. Women are a bit more challenging to work for or with, IMO. Plus being self-employed is what I’m all about (and yes, I did pay taxes – people always ask this). The work itself, from sex to entertaining to comforting, was enjoyable for years.
I do actually love sex, but perhaps more importantly, I love chatting one-on-one with people and am said to relate well with others. You have to love people to do this line of work willfully (though there’s no denying I’d like to shoot most people to the moon some days). But you have to genuinely enjoy interacting with them, listening and drawing them out, asking questions and taking the lead. Not just in the bedroom, but out in public, at restaurants and lounges, the largest portion of the date. It’s not just about schmoozing (for me anyway), but relating and feeling some sort of bond so as to increase the enjoyment of our time together. The clients take notice when you’re feeling the vibe of the evening and those who are shy appreciate their partner setting the mood and leading the conversation.
What’s not to like about a job where people excitedly anticipate your arrival?
It’s more intimate than most any other profession I can think of, except midwifery. How do you not take pride in the ability to reduce someone’s stress and leave them feeling comfortable and satisfied? Not just sexually satisfied preferably, but satisfied overall with how the date went. With the conversation over dinner and laughter over drinks. Satisfying the fantasy of another, even if that’s just to cuddle and play. Creating a “safe space” where these men can confide the feelings and thoughts they’d like to get off their chests, oftentimes pertaining to work and the homelife, is what I strove for. There is a unique bond there, if you’re lucky.
If only we could have just stayed right there, locked in those moments, I would have never left. I loved those aspects of the job and will reminisce over them for many moons to come.
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