Can’t stay gloomy 24/7 for days on end, and in fact I’ve been doing pretty well lately, all things considered. Procrastinated on booking my rental car for the upcoming trip, which is a little irritating, but other than that things are going well for me personally. Put mom on hold for now since we seriously need time to think between responses. Went to the casino with buddies tonight, doubling what I bet on video poker (though a buddy lost at Roulette), and now I’m back home and just finished scrubbing my face with an olive oil and sugar mixture. It left my skin very soft when washed off with Cetaphil cleanser, creating a good canvas for applying a gradual self-tanning facial cream (Jergens – 2nd night using this). The corners of my eyes keep leaking from one of the products I’ve been using, probably an eye shadow, so that’s pretty annoying, but nothing too eventful beyond that is going on.
Call it another phase – I’ve come back to being in the mood for girly products and watching makeup tutorials (though, not to brag, I do all right with application already; it’s just that I haven’t been consistently putting in an effort these last couple of years after falling out of love with my profession and the barscene, yada yada). So basically these past couple of weeks I’ve refocused my attention on updating my makeup bag, replacing old and nearly-empty products, and researching new products and brands to try. Not that I intend to sink a fortune into this endeavor; some stuff was ordered off of ebay. It’s been nice playing invisible this past bit of time but now it would be great to get back to feeling confident and more publicly assertive, which your outward appearance certainly can help with. Plus, my industry obviously rewards the attractive so there’s always that incentive to try harder. The downtime was necessary to reassess where I was going and who I am as a person, and now this leg of the journey is about putting what I’ve learned in action.
Yes, someday, eventually, I do intend to start exercising again. Tired of bugging myself about this. My diet has improved though.
After 3 beers tonight, I’m a little bleary-eyed and blah. Ugh, how I hate being this big of a lightweight. But at least my skin looks glowy. Been drinking water the rest of the night and am still not feeling rehydrated and back to normal. So dumb, I know. It’s getting to where I seriously may have to quit drinking altogether. Bah.
My feet are blistered from all the walking around in heels earlier, trying to look cute out in public with my guypals. And someone is expecting me up at a decent hour tomorrow, so I suppose it’s time to head off to play on another site before hitting the hay.
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wakemenow said
Maybe this is a sign my brain has fizzled out. lol Not enough braincells to sustain me in one direction for long.